Chronological December.

Oh my. If I don't start now, I may get so discouraged about catching up that I never blog again.

Something is better than nothing, right?

I'm just gonna jump right into it with a quick (quick is subjective, here) recap of December (aside from what I've already posted). 

Mainly a pictorial, but you know me, I have to comment every now and again.
Okay, I comment on everything and it always takes me much longer to post than I anticipate.

Mar's first LHS swim meet... more of a scrimmage, but a good way to get back into the swing of swim.

Their team suits had not come in yet, so they were just supposed to wear any suit they had. I had the awesome idea for Mar to wear Lolo's old suit. When I say old, I mean old. This was the suit Shi wore her freshman year of high school. We didn't realize until we were at the meet that the strap was so precariously worn... Mar and I stressed a bit that it might snap at any moment (especially on dives), but it hung in there, thank goodness!

While Bill was in Utah supporting his family after Brian's passing, I decorated for Christmas. By myself. It's not as fun when you do it that way, but I decided to simplify my decorations and found out that I really really liked it. Simplified tree, simplified everything. I didn't even get out a whole entire bin of decor. Guess what? I didn't miss it. And I actually like my tree much better without the boatload of stuff.

I love the natural lighting in my house in December, and couldn't resist snapping a few pics.

"In every season of our lives, in all of the circumstances we may encounter, and in each challenge we may face, Jesus Christ is the light that dispels fear, provides assurance and direction, and engenders enduring peace and joy." (Elder David A. Bednar)

I even simplified my nativity...

...and added only this small water globe to my decor collection.

More swim meets (the team suits finally arrived - yay!)...

...team pics (Becca [middle] swam with Shi; Morgan [right] is the younger sister of another friend that swam with Shi; these three girls are big/little sisters for the season)

This meet was at George Washington HS, where Lolo had her very first high school swim meet as a freshman. I had to grab a quick pic of Mar in {nearly} the same spot:

Throwback to 2010 

(notice the suit Shi is wearing - yep, that same suit that Mar wore at the first meet haha):

We hosted the swim team party. A whole lotto girls came. We loved that the movie Elf was paused at that exact moment... it was like Buddy was there for the party!

We also buried Sister Scharf and hosted a quick going home party.

It was so fun getting to know these cute Sisters as they lived at our home! Sister Palei and Sister Tucker moved into another members home while we were back in Utah for Christmas.

We had a Snow Day the first day of finals. That was a big YIPPEEE for Mar. Because the district was scheduled for half days the rest of the week, instead of adding another day (or having the district go a full day), the teachers had to shorten their tests due to a shortened class period to compensate for the missed day. BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME FOR STUDENTS. I enjoyed the Snow Day too!

I couldn't resist this picture of the beautiful snow and the bright lights around our door.

Because I wanted needed to simplify this year, I hunted down the Star Shower lights for the house. I had to go to 4 (four) Targets to find three units, but it was totally worth not hearing Billy-my-hero complain about putting up house lights by himself. Win-win. I seriously love them! 

(This is the best pic I could get, but they look much cooler than this, I promise.)

Oh, I debated about what to do for the neighbors this year. I felt pinched for time, and had finally decided to purchase a simple gift for each of them, but my scheduled day to do it was the Snow Day (of course). Since there was NO WAY I was going to traverse to the store that day, I whipped up a couple more batches of caramel, then packaged up the candy I had made around Thanksgiving when most of the kids were here. We still had a lot left, and I didn't want it all going to my waste anyway. Another win-win. I had the labels in my file and the boxes in my closet. 

After taking care of all things Christmas prior to heading out of town, we loaded up our car (oh, I forgot to mention... in between all this craziness our car was having issues, so we took it in to the repair shop only to discover it would require a lot o' cash - or credit as the case may be - to fix. It was more than the value of the car, since we like to drive around on-the-cheap haha. We decided that instead of fixing our tired, old, money-pit vehicle, it would be more prudent to invest in a different {hopefully more reliable} one, so we shopped 'til we dropped on the one and only day we had available to find a car.  That's how we roll: one day car shopping. I am praying that the vehicle -- yes, used --  we purchased will be a honey and get us from place to place for many years.)

Our plan was to hit the Star Wars movie (Bill's company was sponsoring a showing), then drive to Laramie, stay in a hotel, then make the drive to Idaho for Jason and Lex's graduation the next day. Unfortunately, when we got to Cheyenne, we discovered that I-80 from Cheyenne to Rawlins was closed, and may stay closed until Saturday. So we did what any desperate parents would do and headed north to Casper, then across Wyoming to Jackson Hole (snow-packed two-lane most the way), then down into Rexburg. Yes, we drove all night. There may or may not have been some tension along the way. But we survived!

We were so so happy to celebrate with these two awesome people:

This was my first BYU-I graduation I've attended, and let me tell ya, it's different than any other. I loved it. Every talk reminded the graduates to keep Jesus Christ and the gospel at the center of their lives. Elder Cook shared a personal experience about two people he knew, one he called "Rich," the other he called "Faithful." He talked about how worldly success, power, prestige, and money cannot and will not ever do more for you than being faithful and true to the gospel. Ahhhh... my sentiments exactly. Yes, it's important to be self-reliant, but too many (including in the church) put too much emphasis on their status, their house, their car, their workout facility, their kids' athletic, academic, or social accomplishments, their clothes, their shoes, their purses (for women haha). What a waste of time, money, and energy, I say.

It was so sweet of the grandparents to make the trek for the big night. They are the best.

Afterwards we celebrated at Applebees with the rest of Rexburg.

We drove down to Bountiful the next day to catch the end of the BYU/UTAH game. Bill was disappointed as he listened via scratchy radio transmission to the first half. By the end of the game all I could say was, "Thank goodness they made a comeback and it wasn't a blow-out!" I thought that was a good and appropriate attitude to take (not to mention my belief that we won't be playing sports in heaven anyway haha).

Sunday morning Bill, Mar and I headed to Music and the Spoken Word with the Tabernacle Choir.

It. Was. Awesome.

A huge thank you to Grandmamita who suggested it!

Later that day we made the long drive out to Utah County to see the progress on Austin and Britt's house.

That evening we headed to Temple Square to see the lights. Mar has NEVER been to see the lights (at least that she can remember, and it's probably been at least 13 to 16 years for us). Now was the time.

Monday morning we were heading to Mar's fave store (Bill and I hate it) Hot Topic in Salt Lake, and, again per Grandmamita's suggestion, stopped by the Church History Museum to see a short movie about Joseph Smith. Once there, we became a bit absorbed in the museum. I had occasionally taken my older children there when we lived in Utah years ago, but Mar had never been (such a deprived child!). This was the printing press the first Book of Mormon was printed on...

They had some recently acquired items of interest, including the clothes Hyrum Smith was wearing when he was martyred. We also enjoyed pointing out that Lolo is serving in some of the same areas of the early missions of the Church... and we LOVED the art contest entries/winners(?) on display upstairs. It was the best hour+ of the day, and I certainly plan to go back when we have more time to peruse.

That evening we had the Goldsberry annual progressive dinner. It was decided this year to have each home make something from a different country. We started at Marty's house - Mexico.

Of course Grandmamita and I did England... complete with a proper tea, scones, English Cottage Pie, Yorkshire pudding, and trifle. I think we did a mighty fine job of representing {wink}.

Rob, Sookie, and Evie did Fiji, since Evie had recently completed a report for school on that country (how perfect is that?).

Matt and Lia did the land of Hot Chocolandia. I want to live there haha.

Games...

Music... (this was the piano I learned to play on... "play" is subjective there)

...and the cutest little Santa ever.

Christmas Eve we spent celebrating with the Syddalls.

We all loved their new pup Hank. Next time we see him, we won't be able to hold him.

A brave few souls tried the pantyhose tug-of-war game...

It was definitely good for some laughs and memories.

Bill and I planned the {Billats} candy bar game... I think it was a success.

The kids all opened a gift from Grandma and Grandpa Santa, then we gave pictures to Robyn and the boys and Bill's parents.

There may or may not have been some tears shed.

Back out to Bountiful where we opened our Christmas jammies...

...and Santa came.

Too cute not to post haha.

There's a long story behind those two Tungsten rings {wink}.

Best moment of the day... chatting it up with Sister Syddall in jolly old England.

She did a great British accent for us, but I still have to get it from Mar, since I inadvertently STOPPED recording at the just right time, dang phone (and phone operator).

Ready for Christmas Day dinner at Grandmamita's.

Britt, Austin and Scarlett came out later that evening and brought me some of my favorite Christmas presents ever... photobooks of Wonderful Sweet Scarlett and a cell phone case with her picture. Ahhhh.... so adorable! I didn't get any other pics that night, but let it be said we played a few rousing games of Tenzi.

We were heading back to CO the following day, but we stopped by Grandma and Grandpa Syddall's for a couple of hours on our way out. They spoiled us with sweet gifts, but the best gift was being together.

Another couple "too cute not to post" pictures of Bill. What can I say, I love him.

We stopped by the cemetery on our way out to visit Brian's grave.

Bill thought his parents might stop by later that day, so he made a little trail and cleared the snow so they could have easier access. A huge thank you to thoughtful fellow-cemetery visitors who bring snow shovels to make paths for others.

Once we were home, we pulled out the pups Christmas gifts. Jack-o immediately tore into his toys and has proceeded to leave threads and stuffing everywhere. I love their British sweaters, don't you? Ava's is a bit tight, but I'm a pro at stretching post wash, so hopefully that will make it a bit more comfortable for her.

It's been quite a year.
Quick and slow at the same time. Happy and sad at the same time. Hard and easy at the same time.

Tonight we will be celebrating with Jason and Lex. Did you know they have moved in with us until they can find gainful employment? I'm sooooooo excited to have them here!

2016, be good to me! {Please?}

He knows our need.

I don't even know where to start. 

So many things continue to change, so many tears are still being shed, yet life continues at a maddening pace as it rushes swiftly on it's way. I am torn between the need to pause, focus on the things that REALLY matter, and care for the spiritual/mental/physical well-being of my family, and running, running, running just to keep up with the everyday things that are good... important... necessary.

The song that keeps running through my mind (and played in at least a dozen different versions on my Christmas playlist) is O Holy Night. My favorite verse is the middle one, the one that gets left out of most modern renditions.

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,

With glowing hearts, by His cradle we stand.

So, led by light of a star sweetly gleaming,

Here come the wise men from Orient land.

The King of Kings lay thus in lowly manger,

In all our trials, born to be a friend.

He knows our need!

To our weakness is no stranger!

Behold, your King! Before Him lowly bend!

Behold, your King! Your King, before Him bend!

Bill's brother was killed 11.30.15 in an automobile accident.

We, who have not known the sorrow and sadness that accompanies the death of a close loved one (other than our dear - yet aged - grandmothers and grandfathers), have now experienced it, unexpectedly, twice in 6 weeks. Tears come at the strangest times. We are trying to wrap our heads around the hole in our hearts and the change this will make in our families. One minute we can be laughing and talking together about good memories, the next can be filled with red eyes, flowing tears, and sad hearts.

But in between all of that, life rushes on. Crazily. Swiftly.

I am most certain that the frenzied pace of today's modern world is carefully and cunningly crafted by Satan to pull us away from what really matters. I know we've been saying that for years now, but it's more apparent to me than EVER before, especially since the dawn of smartphones. I can SEE the difference between rearing my older children (really, they aren't THAT old, but they are PRE smartphone era) and my younger children. The pace is FASTER. The desire to have more, be more, and do more is DEEPER. I feel it in my bones that it may be what destroys our spirit if left unchecked. I want to scream at people, "PUT THAT DOWN! BE PRESENT! BE AWARE! INTERACT WITH THOSE AROUND YOU! TALK TO THEM, FOR GOODNESS SAKE! THAT DEVICE IN YOUR HAND IS NOT YOUR LIFELINE TO REALITY, IT TAKES YOU AWAY FROM IT!"

I want to share a few precious moments from last weekend in loving memory of a great father, brother, son, and uncle.

I think Wonderful Sweet Scarlett could sense the pain and sadness in Great Granny, so she gave her a kiss. I've never even had that pleasure. So so precious that she could offer that tiny gift.  Another of my favorite Christmas songs is In the Bleak Midwinter, and I love this verse:

What can I give Him, poor as I am?

If I were a shepherd, I would bring a lamb;

If I were a Wise Man, I would do my part;

Yet what can I give Him? Give my heart.

 Scarlett loved a nearby grave that was decorated with all things beautiful... pinwheels, ladybugs, and this cute little birdie. Britt told me later that she was a little disturbed because it happened to be an Anderson grave - I hadn't noticed.

Out of love for my SIL Robyn, I didn't want to post many pictures of her. I can't imagine her grief and pain. I think this picture says it all, and makes me tear up every time I see it.

Scarlett continued to cheer up those around her, and helped bring a smile to Great Grandpa's face. I think she reminded us all of the continuity of life and the hope we have for the life to come.


Sunday morning we drove over to the cemetery to visit Brian's grave. I loved how the rays of the sun shone around us as we reflected for a few minutes. I loved Elder Bednar's talk at the Christmas devotional about LIGHT that he gave that very evening. We were blessed to catch ONLY THAT TALK (and the song In the Bleak Midwinter... seriously!) as we tried to access the devotional during our long drive back to CO. That was one of many tender mercies during the past few weeks.

After stopping by Brian's grave, we drove back to Bountiful to visit J's.
It happened to be her birthday.

I love this beautiful wreath my mom made for her grave with the pink angel. My mom talked about how she wanted to find a white one, but couldn't. Jana would like the pink one, I told her.  It makes my heart hurt to think of my mother lovingly and sorrowfully making a beautiful decoration for her child's grave. I can't even imagine. "[Jana] LOVED Christmas" she wrote on facebook, "We still cannot believe that she is not here with us."

Spoiler alert: Jill, if you are reading this, stop now.

I wanted to do something in memory of J, so I looked and looked for necklaces to give my mom and sister (+ one for me). I have one I wear for Shi and it helps keep her close to me. I know it doesn't do anything for HER, but it keeps a mother's mind at ease to feel that her child is close to her heart. I KNOW it sounds corny, but I honestly feel that it helps me deal with the separation. I wanted to share that with my mom and sister... and then after Brian's passing, felt prompted to also share with Robyn and Bill's mom. I finally found the perfect (to me) necklace that has a cutout tree over an engraved circle that says "A family's love is forever" in the middle, and "A family is a circle of love" around the edges. I love the symbolism of the tree: a family tree... the tree of life... the love of God... so many meanings.


Well, my time tonight is gone. Life has gone on, and this week has been a doozy, crammed with all kinds of things to keep us running like crazy. In the interest of journaling and memory-keeping, I hope to post about it, but know it may not happen until after many more life events have occurred. I'm hoping to keep up. I DO put my phone away more frequently, and encourage those around me to do the same. And to say I love you more. Do it.

A Soloist.

My time is so precious {and so limited} these days, it's hard to find a moment to post, but I had to give a quick shout out to my dearest running-my-feet-off-keeping-me-hopping youngest child because I am so proud of her.

She's already had two (2) choir concerts this year - the first was right before Fall Break. Mar is in the "non-audition" choir (reminder about how I love that phrase here). 

LHS has their choir concerts at a great and spacious large church in our community. It has all the bells and whistles for a rockin'-out good show. It's pretty darn cool. The choirs also sing a whole lot 'o Christian songs, for which I am so so happy, thanks to a devoutly Christian choir director. I'm impressed that in this day and age of anti-religion and the you-can't-leave-anyone-out mindset, our school still manages to allow it.

Because I'm new {again} to this choir business, I wasn't sure where the best place to sit would be. I asked Mar what side she was standing on, she told me the left, so we sat left. 

Things I've learned (that I forgot I had already learned): if your child is standing on the left, you want to sit on the right so as to actually see her face (vs the side of her head). There are cameramen in contraptions that move around to get different angles and shots of the choir to concurrently display on the dual jumbo-trons, but left was also the least filmed side. Live and learn.

We started a tradition last year in middle school of going to Kneaders with the Hawleys for a treat after each concert. Mar and Christina, of course, wanted to continue the tradition.


Mar's second concert was this past Monday. The choir director doesn't like to hold them in the middle of the holidays, so the Wintersong concert is always at the beginning of November.
Mar tried out for one of the three solo spots and got one! She had tried out for a solo for the first concert and hadn't made it, but she had such a great attitude. She told me she was going to keep trying out, even if she never got a solo, just so Mr. Stroman would get to know her and her voice better (for those try-out choirs coming up next year). When trying out, you have to sing in front of the whole class, so it's not necessarily an easy thing.

I volunteered to be a ticket taker, which also allowed me to save a couple of seats for Bill and I. And for this concert, I knew where to sit.

Nice job, Mar!

This week Mar also started swim practices (Mon-Fri), is gearing up for a piano duet recital in less than two weeks, and starting drivers ed classes this month. I'm telling you, taxiing her around will be the death of me.

I'd better run - Britt and Scarlett are coming on Saturday (YAY!) and I have a lot o' work to get done.

Post post: Taylor was offered an internship this summer here in Denver!!!! He and Lynnea will be living with us from April to August. After graduation, Lex and Jason may be heading out this way, too! All my wildest dreams ARE coming true!

A Quick Halloween Recap.

Just wanted to quickly recap our Halloween festivities around these parts.

Mar dressed up as a zombie for LHS's trick-or-treat activity on Thursday.
The swim team decorated a room and their theme was.... Zombies, of course.

The shirt Mar is wearing is the same shirt Taylor wore for his 5th grade zombie program at Fox Hills Elementary, saved for such a time as this haha.

... a little blood... and ratted hair... completed the effect.

Friday night was our ward's Fall Festival, and Mar dressed up as Flo from Progressive. Funny enough, another couple in our ward came as Flo and Jake from State Farm.

Mar invited her friend Lauren to come... Bill couldn't resist a few photo bomb ops.

I did not dress up. Bill wore his Captain America shirt. It's the best we could muster this year {wink}.

The ward party was a smashing success, and the costumes were awesome, as usual. 

Here are just a few of the participants:

For Halloween night, Mar and some of her friends had decided to do a group costume.

Let me tell you, there is a whole lot o' texting required in a group of six (6) to agree on exactly WHAT that group costume should be. Finally it was decided to go the "Chick Magnet" route. The girls made their tutus and shopped for boas and shirts online. Lauren and Mar hunted down some orange lipstick for their little pouty chick beaks. They all turned out supa cute.

The "magnet" pic:

The whole purpose of a creative group costume is, of course, for posting to social media.

Thus everyone can like and comment on how wonderfully creative and awesome you all are.

As we were snapping pics, I couldn't resist getting one of the beautiful skyscape that evening... blue and orange, Bill noted... predicting a good outcome for the Broncos on Sunday (we are, as you know, a HUGE Broncos fam!). 

Bill quickly donned a wig (we didn't think the shirt would qualify as a "costume"), and took this bunch of chicks and their magnet to Chipotle for $3 burritos. The workers there took pics and said it was the best costume(s) they'd seen all day. Afterwards they went trick-or-treating to nearby homes, then headed to Cass's house for a movie (which didn't end up happening due to technical difficulties) and to chillax. Since the Sisters have commandeered our basement, we are currently unable to supply the party house.

Thanks to that social media flood, I can also share a few pics of my other chidlets enjoying the holiday:

Read about Lolo's first European Halloween here.

Today I am tearing down the Halloween and gearing up for THANKSGIVING. Before I do, however, I had to snap quick pics of my masked picture wall. I've done this once before a few years back, and LOVE it! As you walk by the pictures, it's almost like the eyes move. Such a cheap and easy ("easy" could be subjective, here - those tiny masks are pretty tricky to measure, cut, and tape!) decoration that always make me smile :-)

Halloween 2015... historified.